The sarcasm roll

In this past week, I feel like I’ve been going on a sarcastic roll, and either it’s started because I want to drown myself in nutella because midterms are coming up fast, or because of that whole “art History is pointless” scene where I educated my prof. Actually I probably didn’t educate demon prof because she’s a really stubborn person who will resist change as long as she’s alive.

Seriously.  Demon prof was teaching my Physical Chem class about enzymes, and for some reason she mentioned that whenever she sees the ending “ase” she shudders and I almost raised my hand and asked if she hated mayonnaise.  I didn’t because earlier in that class a guys phone went off and it was playing “Carry On My Wayward Son” so I was in the corner going:

Meanwhile demon prof scolded the guy and she was all like “Did you even attend the first class when I covered cellphones??”
Guy: “probably not”

Another instance in my sarcasm roll is that one day a bio prof came into my O Chem 3 class to do a peer evaluation for my O Chem prof and she was all like “Sorry! I’m crashing your guy’s party!”
Me: “Are you even certified in party crashing?”
I only said that loud enough for my friend to hear and she started laughing.

Later in that same class, my O Chem prof was all like “If you open a can of pop why does carbon dioxide go out and never come back into the can?”
I was just about to say “It just wants to be FREE” but then somebody said the correct answer which was entropy.

ADDITIONALLY, today my O chem prof went over the molecular orbital theory for methane.  There’s only 3 people in that O chem class that has taken enough Inorganic Chem to already know what goes on and two of them were apparently grinning, because the prof noticed them looking at each other and smiling. Meanwhile I assumed that I must have had a terrified look on my face because I had tried so hard to suppress the memories of all my Inorganic Chem classes.  Anyways, so my O Chem prof said “GUESS WHAT!  You know how in first year we told you that all of the bonds in methane are the same?  WE LIED AND MOLECULAR ORBITAL THEORY PROVES THAT WE LIED!”

Then, later when he was wrapping up the methane molecular orbital theory slide, my o chem prof was all like “NOW! What’s the big take away from this slide?”
Me: *quietly* “That you lied.”


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